"Wet and Wild"

By Leslie Surgento

I acknowledge that Buffy the Vampire Slayer and all associated characters were probably created by Joss Whedon. No copyright infringement is intended. (In other words, please don't sue me.)

Thanks to Jennifer M., Lynn, Mina, and SuperPixie

Xander Harris stopped mid knock as he stood listening at the bedroom door of one Willow Rosenberg. He could not believe what he was hearing!

Oz: Are you sure Willow?

Willow: Yes, Oz I am.

Oz: You know it'll probably hurt.

Willow: I know, but I can't wait any longer. Besides, it's all wet now. If we wait, it may not be as easy. You'll be gentle with me won't you?

Oz: How can you even ask that question? I love you. I'd never hurt you. Intentionally that is. Cause I can pretty much guarantee this IS gonna hurt. OK, here goes.

After a few moments...

Willow: Oh Oz...That feels so good. Could you go just a little slower?

Oz: Sure...Is this better?

Willow: Mmmmmm.... Much better.

Oz: Oh good...Does it still hurt?

Willow: Just a bit. But if you went a bit faster now, and to the right, I don't think I would mind so much.

Just as Xander was trying to pry himself away from the door, he saw Mrs. Rosenberg heading up the stairs with a tray of cookies and three glasses of milk. < My god! I gotta head her off. > Xander thought. It was hard enough for him know what was going on behind Willow's door, but he couldn't imagine what Mrs. Rosenberg's reaction would be!

"Mrs. Rosenberg!" Xander exclaimed in a very loud voice, hoping to alert Willow to the presence of her mother.

"Xander? What are you doing out here? Aren't they through in there yet?"

"N---N---No?" Xander stammered, unable to accept that Mrs. Rosenberg not only knew what was going on but also came bearing post-coital snacks.

"If you'd come by earlier, it might be you in there instead of Oz."

"Huh?"

"I guess they will be done soon. Oh, there's the phone. Here Xander." Mrs. Rosenberg thrust the tray at him. "Can you take this in for me?"

"Uh...sure Mrs. Rosenberg," Xander replied weakly, accepting the tray before she could disappear downstairs.

Just then he heard Willow let out a brief cry. Xander's stomach did a flip-flop realizing the implication of the cry. It was all so hard to take in. Willow, his Willow, was having...having s--se--se-- (he couldn't even think it) with wolfboy *and* her mother not only knew but somehow didn't mind.

Willow cried out again, obviously in pain. That did it for Xander. Nobody hurt his Willow. Without so much as knocking, he flung open the door to Willow's room and burst in, pretty sure of what he would see. He was never more wrong.

Oz was *not* sprawled on top of Willow in her bed as Xander had been prepared to see. Nor did it seem that Willow was trying to get away from him. Instead, he found the redhead seated at her desk with Oz standing right behind her, a brush in one hand and scissors in the other.

"Goodie! Snacks!" Willow exclaimed.

"Wil, Oz...you're notnot uhwhat *are* you doing?" Xander asked hesitantly, trying to take in the scene before him as he set the milk and cookies down on the desk. He felt the flush of embarrassment begin to creep up from his neck, to his chin, up his cheeks, and finally stop at his forehead. Xander didn't even need to think about his burning ears!

"My mom had to help me wash my hair, cause I still have to be careful of the stitches. But we ran out of conditioner. And you know how wild my hair gets when it's wet. Especially if I don't brush it out right away. So when Oz showed up early, he offered to brush it out for me." Willow explained.

"But there's this knot that I can't get out, so I have to cut it out." Oz explained, waving the scissors as if to emphasize his statement.

"Is it really big?"

"Don't worry," Oz reassured his girlfriend. "It's only small knot-sized."

"That's good cause I don't want to be missing a clump of hair like the last time Xander offered to help me with my hair," Willow playfully admonished.

A look of mock hurt crossed Xander's face. "That was *not* my fault, and besides, we were eight."

"Xander," Willow began. "Not that I really mind, but why'd you come bursting in here like that?"

"It's actually kinda funny. Before I came in, I could hear you guys from the hallway."

"So?"

"Well it sounded like you were uh hav-, that you two were um-"

"What?" Willow cut Xander off.

"Itsoundedlikeyouttwowereinherehavingsexandyourmotherknewanditsoundedlike
Ozwashurtingyou." Xander spoke in one large breath.

"You thought we were having sex?" Oz asked, a bit surprised at what Xander had been thinking. "With Willow's mom home...that's crazy."

Xander visibly relaxed. < What was I thinking? > he thought to himself. This was after all *Willow*.

"Yeah silly," Willow began. "We only ever have sex in the back of Oz's van!"

~End~